For nearly a year after she turned one, my niece only ate sausages and dry Weetabix and drank lots and lots of milk every day! We worried about her health but she seemed healthy and in good form.
My son however ate whatever I gave him. Both were born in the same week and we spent lots of time together so they were offered fairly the same food at the same time. We couldn’t understand what made my niece such a fussy eater from a very young age.
Now 9 years old, both my son and my niece are of similar healthy builtd and eat a big variety of food.
Most parents will encounter the fussy eater at some stage in their toddler’s development, and the key thing is not to worry. Remember being a kid and maybe a fussy eater too? Remember how you never ate your greens until you were a teenager (perhaps not even then?!) and you seemed to turn out okay.
When it comes to breakfast, lunch and dinner, kids will be kids, in that they’ll let you know exactly what they will eat and what they won’t. However, at this young age, it’s usually because they’re experimenting with lots of different flavours, food textures and yes, even colours, that makes them fixate upon certain foods.
Everything’s new when you’re young and being asked to taste all these dishes for the first time, it’s a bit stressful. So if your child sticks on a certain food, don’t make a big deal of it. If it’s a healthy food, great – encourage them to eat what they will, but try also to introduce small amounts of what you’d like them to eat alongside it. One fruit or veg at the time. No more!
No child can like all foods however, so when it comes to finding out what your child will eat, it’s all about trial and error. It also helps if you leave off bringing high sugary snacks into the mix until they’re around school-age. As they say – what you haven’t tasted yet, you can’t yet crave…

‘I do it myself’ – we’ve all heard it, and it’s a phrase that can elicit everything from a knowing smile, to a shiver of dread. At three, our kids want to be just like us – they’re that little bit more independent and don’t they just love showing it? If they don’t get what they want, well, then it’s Tantrum at three years old time. And three-year-old tantrums are a little more epic, shall we say, than the twos’…

Two-years-old, we now realise, were nothing compared to this. Once they hit three, they’ve acquired a usable vocabulary – and boy, do they like to use it. Okay, they might not always make sense, but let’s face it – when you’re in the supermarket and your child’s cooking up a storm, is that really the point?

Speaking of supermarkets, a three-year-old no longer accepts what you try to feed them. Gone are the days when your adorable toddler will happily consume what’s good for them. Now, at three, they become picky. They choose a food they like and they stick with it. If you’re lucky, they might settle on three foods they like (there’s that number again!), and woe betide you if you try sneaking anything else onto the plate!

Three-year-olds are great, but now that they’re potty trained (a minor miracle at the time), it means little accidents are an ever-present danger. Oh, and the toilets are never handy when you need them.

At three, kids want to dress themselves (slowly), attempt to do everything you do (very slowly), and quite frankly, when they don’t get their way – their Tantrum at three years old are on a whole new level. At three, kids can manipulate like there’s no tomorrow and bless them – it’s a talent they practice to the maximum. As for their motor skills? Improvements in that regard are usually best observed during a yelling and kicking-in-the-shins fit in the car park. Preferably a busy Saturday car park. Or maybe a quiet coffee shop…

In my opinion, the best way to deal with it is to have rules and boundaries in place that you need to stick to no matter what. Yes there will be times when it’s easier to give in, but one or twice won’t do much harm. Children at all ages feel secure when there are rules and boundaries, I know it’s hard to believe.

Stick to your guns, be as cool as a cucumber and let the storm pass. It could be embarrassing sometimes in public places, but think about what you want for your child and not what others think.

The early years can definitely be trying, but look at the bright side – it’s only a phase, right?

How to survive the terrible twos

Last month we looked at how to tackle the ‘terrible ones’, so now it’s time for ‘the twos’…

As we’ve already established – and as any parent will know – age two might be the most talked about year for tantrums, but they really can start from day one. However, by the age of two, there are different things to consider as to why your child is playing up, so it’s important to be aware of these.

The power of ‘no’

One of the key differences at this age is that by now, most children will have learned how to say ‘no’. A one-year-old wants to say no and screams as they try, but a two-year-old has the power of speech, which changes everything. They’re still not fully competent in this area however, so they’ll use the few words they can to maximise their effect.

Two-year-olds are also a lot more mobile, which can create trouble when they try to exert their new-found independence and are subsequently told off for it. They’re more inquisitive but still can’t move around as much as they might like, and they’re constantly being told ‘no’ by mum and dad. All of this leads to unwanted tantrums.

At this age, your two-year-old is undergoing a range of motor, intellectual, social and emotional changes, which all makes it very frustrating to be a toddler. So, it’s vital you consider this when disciplining your child, and consider the best ways to manage their behaviour.

What parents can do to help:

• Always try to be patient
• Limit your use of ‘no’
• Find alternatives for your child if they want to do something that isn’t allowed
• Use other ways to discipline your child, rather than shouting e.g. humour or redirecting their attention elsewhere
• Praise your child as soon as they respond in a positive way
• Recognise potentially tantrum-inducing situations and try to avoid them

Tackling tantrums at age 1:  ‘terrible ones’

We’ve all heard of the Terrible Twos, but tantrums in our children (as most parents will know!) often start long before they turn two. In fact, it’s normal for your baby to begin demonstrating assertive behaviour soon after their first birthday, and it’s important to understand why.

All children, of course, develop at different rates, but at around the age of one, they’re generally beginning to become more aware of their world. They want to do things for themselves, but can’t. They want to express themselves – say ‘no’ to things – but can’t yet do this with speech. They’re curious and want to explore, but aren’t aware of the dangers, so they get upset when you stop their adventuring.

You may be in a hurry to get lunch finished, but your child wants to have a go; making a mess but in doing so, achieving something for themselves. Children want to control their environment and when they can’t, they do the only thing they can – they have a tantrum.

To avoid even worse behaviour by the age of two, it’s important to tackle tantrums head-on as soon as they start. Babyhood doesn’t last long, so it’s up to you as a parent to help your baby acquire his or her independence while still protecting them from any risks.

How do you do this?

• Where you safely can, let your baby say ‘no’, and accept this.
• Always stay one step ahead – don’t take a tired toddler on one last errand after a busy day…
• Remain calm when a tantrum does strike, and don’t ignore it – acknowledge the behaviour by talking reassuringly to your child.
• Remember – your child understands more than he/she can communicate at this stage, so warn them about their behaviour if you see a tantrum brewing, and change your schedule accordingly to avoid trouble.